 We lost music royalty this week. In April 20th, Prince Roger Nelson, arguably, one of the most influential musicians ever, died at age 57. There is no doubt that a void in the world of music and culture which he once filled abundantly, even with his demure statue. Prince didn't just personify music (as if that were a insignificant achievement). He defined "transcendent". There were no boundaries he couldn't or wouldn't cross. Whether they be generational, musical genres or sexuality norms. The word traditional was a challenge to him. To him, the word Acceptable meant whatever he created. And this is why his creations represented courage so many of us wish we could express in our own lives. Just by listening to our favorite songs, we were vicariously brave like Prince. He was our avatar in a spiritual/emotional place where rules were meant to be broken. So it's understandable why so many people are grieving the physical death of the legend. Post after post on social media start off with "I am so sad." Remember "I Am" are the two most powerful words you can speak or even think. Those words create or destroy your potential success before you even get started. It is literally a powerful prayer to the God in you which determines who or what you will be. So, even while mourning, it's critically important that you choose your words and character wisely. Saying "I am sad" means so much more than just how you feel. It also determines what you do and how you think. It's much more productive to choose powerful words to finish your "I am" statement. What words did Prince leave behind as his legacy? These three come to mind for me. INSPIRED Choose to be inspired by Prince's life rather than sad about his passing. Stop living the life you dream about through Prince's songs and begin to deliberately create and live a better than average life. We tend to think that celebrities like Prince and Michael Jackson were the only ones who inspire people through their ability to entertain the masses. However, there are hundreds of thousands of singers who are just as talented but go unnoticed. What's the difference? Is it that they don't push themselves to be more and do more with their talents? Is it because they don't think to use their gift as a contribution to the world, so they play small with it? You must define your truth by choosing three or four words that you want to describe who you are to yourself and others. Choose characteristics and personality traits that naturally generate pride. Select personality traits like caring, devoted, driven, compassionate, helpful. Living your life in congruence with what you feel is worthy of pride and holding yourself to that standard; making that your absolute truth - removes any suggestion of arrogance. It will be evident that you are living to inspire by being the best you that is possible. The ability to inspire other people is a skill very few people develop because they don't know they can. It's not a talent in of itself nor is it dependant on any particular innate ability. It's a skill that you can develop no matter if you're a customer service agent or a singer, a bank teller or an actor. You have the ability to inspire someone by contributing to the world you live in. How so? By being the best you that you can possibly be. You have the ability to inspire someone by contributing to the world you live in. How so? By being the best you that you can possibly be. GRATEFUL Choose to be grateful that your lifetime experienced one of the few people who personified music. Be grateful he created enough beautiful music to help us get through this thing called life which means forever and that's a mighty long time! JOYFUL Choose to celebrate that Prince made it to that "something else" he told us about: The after world. A world of never ending happiness You can always see the sun, day or night. Whatever your personal beliefs about religion or spirituality, have faith that Prince is where he wants to be now; at peace. Choose to honor Prince the best you can by being Better Than Average at whatever it is you do.  What's It Gonna Take?
A loved one's death? A divorce? An life threatening accident? An addiction? Incarceration? Homelessness? Illness or worse? Most often it takes a great tragedy to occur before people decide to make significant changes in their lives. If you're waiting for the right moment or the right inspiration or that day to come before you decide you're going to be more and do more with your life remember that most often it takes a great tragedy to occur before we see the need for improvement and personal development in our lives - I can tell you from experience, that will most likely be the most miserable day of your life.  I sit in this empty conference room waiting for the final class of my small business boot camp to begin and I come to the full realization the real work of being a business owner hasn't even started yet. The 17 hour days I've put in for the past 12 weeks didn't really count. That was only conditioning. The agonizing brainstorming sessions spent trying to create effective yet affordable marketing tactics were just warm up drills before the actual game. The stressful days spent developing operations and management strategies that maximize output and minimize costs were just a preliminary bouts before the main event: Me, the underdog versus a heavyweight champion called the world. All the while, the critics, sceptics and even haters watch with exhilaration, feverishly rooting against me, anxiously waiting, hoping and some even praying for me to fail. "Are you not entertained?!?" I yell to them in my head. Funding, awards, recognition, prestige that often goes hand in hand with the human services "industry" can be appealing and alluring. Especially when, often times, you go unrecognized and unappreciated by those closest to you. It's times like this I'm glad I have clearly defined my Y.U.R. For those unfamiliar with that acronym, that is a mnemonic device meaning "Why You Are..." It is my emotionally compelling reason for doing what I do in order to get what I want, defined. In other words; my motivation. I've said it before and I'll probably say it another 10,000 times. There was a time when I believed I was destined for failure simply because of my skin color, age and gender. The story that society told me about what was expected out of people who looked me was, we weren't expected to succeed. We weren't expected to even live. I learned the truth and changed the trajectory of my life. And now I want to teach others that same truth. I have worked really hard to build a platform where I can inspire people to be, do and have more than what they believe they is possible. Whether that be the gangbanger, the ex-con, the knucklehead kid still in elementary school or the single mother who wants more for herself and her family. They each deserve to know the truth about what they are capable of achieving and having and being.
As I write this on April 4th, the anniversary of Dr King's death I understand he didn't plan to be an activist, celebrity or rich man. He simply had a goal to make a difference. Money, ego and turf weren't the motivating factors for him. A few months ago I realized that Dr. Martin Luther King didn't plan to be an activist, celebrity or rich man. He simply had a goal to make a difference. Money, ego and turf weren't the motivating factors for him to live the life he is now remembered for. And while I hold no illusions that I'm the next great Dr. Martin Luther King jr, I want to create and leave a legacy as being a beacon of inspiration for what is possible when you choose to live a better than average life. Even if I'm not specifically remembered by name, I would like for my ideas to contribute to the restoration hope to our society for generations and generations to come.
Fear is the Unforgivable Sin
Let's be honest. You have dreams and ambitions for you and your family. You know generally, if not exactly, what you have to do to achieve the goals that you set for yourself but something stops you from taking action. Fear. Fear has immobilized you. You fear how others will perceive you and what they'll say about you. You fear the changes you'll have to make in your lifestyle. You fear the possibility of failure. Fear is completely natural and usually understandable, but in order to live the live the life and experience the happiness you long for, you cannot let these fears override your your desire for what you know is best for you and your family. Identifying these fears is the first step in defeating them. Read the following descriptions of commons fears which limit success. Which one is most jeopardizing the potential success you know you’re capable of achieving and deserve? 1. Leaving Your Comfort Zone You are slowing dying in a comfort zone that is more fragile than you can ever imagine. Compare it to an egg. Only one good thing can happen to an unhatched egg. In order to live you must apply pressure from the inside and leave that shell under your own initiative. I highly advise you force yourself to leave that comfort zone behind now by purposefully creating a better than average life for yourself. You have to choose to either be the chef or the omelette. The later means sitting back in that eggshell comfort zone and patiently wait to be a casualty of someone else's change. 2. Change “Progress is a nice word. But change is its motivator and change has its enemies." - Robert F. Kennedy Change is inevitable and a lot of times it is downright violent and destructive to the status quo. But when it's managed and purposeful it can be gloriously beautiful and inspire not only those close to you, but also an entire revolution that makes a difference in the quality of the world. That revolution starts with someone and that someone can be you. 3. Criticism “Find someone who is willing to share the truth with you." - Jim Rohn Sadly, in today's American society to point out an opportunity for improvement equates to the average person as "being hated on". It's become cool to be a victim and anyone who points out an avenue to travel in the direction of success is seen as victimizing them even further by challenging that way of thinking. Even the most well meaning, helpful advice is now heard as judgement. Better than average people seek out constructive criticism and embrace the feedback. “Critical feedback is the breakfast of champions. Defensiveness is the dinner of losers.” –Dharmesh Shah 4. What Other People Think About You The other side of the criticism coin is worrying about what other people think about you. It’s none of your business. Unless the people whose opinions you’re concerned about are the ones who are in a position and willing to help you achieve your goals then why do you care? It’s silly stupid to spend time and energy trying to be a person who you’re not happy being in the process of trying to make someone else happy. It’s even more stupid to not pursue your goals out of fear of what someone else thinks. The truth of the matter is; no one cares. Yes, everyone has an opinion of you, no matter what you do. But opinions are like buttholes; everyone has one and they’re all full of crap. 5. Challenges People often live lives full of meaningless victories and only do things they are sure they can achieve out of fear of failing at something they really want. Challenges are supposed to push you to or at least close to your limits. Real challenges don't leave you as the same person you were before you attempted to overcome them. You're either broken or better. That's why, in order to grow personally, professionally, spiritually, emotionally, and financially, it's important to take on real challenges that will develop you into a better person. 6. Asking For Help People who are truly sincere about achieving their goals seek out people who are successful at the things that they don’t know how to do. They find mentors who have achieved the goals that they are working towards to help guide and teach them. This is an area where you cannot allow fear to stop you from doing what is necessary. You cannot be shy, introverted, timid nor too proud to ask someone wiser than you to teach you how to achieve the goals you've set. 7. Failure It's important to remember that failure can be the most valuable weapon in your arsenal if you embrace it as an opportunity to become wiser and more valuable. Yet most people never even try to succeed out of fear of failure. But like Will Smith’s character stated in the film After Earth;
What that soliloquy illustrates is the power of emotionalizing. That is the act of imagining how it will feel when you achieve, or don’t achieve your goal.
For most people, fear is an emotion that motivates them to create and achieve goals so insignificant they are practically subconscious. The fear of getting fired, or being homeless is exactly what keeps them diligently showing up to an unsatisfying job where they perform just well enough not to get fired. Paying bills, rent, and putting food on the table - just surviving - becomes the goal. Emotionalizing what not surviving feels like is what keeps them going. Emotionalizing what it feels like to fail is what keeps most people from ever trying anything new or taking any risks. Whether it be new foods or new careers. We turn up our noses and scowl our faces at the mere thought of trying foods that are untasted but different. They could be disgusting! But they also could be delicious! What if you focused the power of emotionalizing not on fear, but rather on something good like how achievements and successes would make you feel? How much more would you accomplish if you emotionalized pride? How much bigger and significant would the goals you set be? Chances are they would be better than average. Learn How to Crush Your Fears and Achieve Your Goals Are you interested in learning how to overcome your fears and begin to accomplish the goals that will make your life significant and worth living? Do you want to learn proven strategies and techniques that will help you accomplish your biggest goals? |
AuthorI am a simple man who has lived a complicated life. The lessons I've learned from the experiences I've been through and the challenges I've conquered have helped me develop a philosophy that life is meant to be lived at a level better than average. Archives
September 2019
|
RSS Feed
